For the past seven years, Samantha Markle has made a career out of harassing and publicly maligning her beloved and successful sister.
Because success often attracts envy, there’s an entire cottage industry centered around hurling vitriol at Meghan, and for a long time, Samantha was the unofficial spokesperson for this loser brigade.
Over time, however, even the most scathing media outlets have realized that Sam knows very little about the Duchess of Sussex and is only able to regurgitate insults and boring anecdotes from Meghan’s early childhood .
And so, with no marketable skills and nothing to show for her adult life but an impressive accumulation of jealousy, Samantha is forced to change her tactics and capitalize on her sister in an even more nefarious way. has been forced.
Yes, Samantha is now filing a harassment suit against Meghan.
And while it seems unlikely she’ll be able to win any of them, Sam has nothing but time, which means she’s free to devote herself entirely to being an insect.
according to a new report from entertainment tonightSamantha filed a $75,000 lawsuit against Meghan on Friday, alleging defamation based on “false and malicious statements made by her half-sister to a worldwide audience.”
The suit stems from Meghan’s 2021 Oprah interview, in which she briefly referred to her upbringing.
Sam alleges Meghan “published and disseminated false and malicious statements” by talking about her own childhood.
This isn’t the first time that Sam has filed a lawsuit, and it isn’t the first time that he has accused Meghan of lying during an Oprah interview.
But this may be the first time the Duchess will actually be forced to address Samantha’s idiocy with anything other than a wink and dismissive laugh.
The judge in Markle v Markle has ordered that Meghan and husband Prince Harry be seated to testify and answer questions about their past public statements.
Judge Charlene Edwards Honeywell wrote, “Defendant Markle does not show that the unusual circumstances justify the requested stay, or that prejudice or undue burden would result if the court did not grant the stay.”
But if Samantha is counting this as a legal victory, she’s more delusional than we thought.
Judge Honeywell also wrote that the case is “ripe for dismissal”, which is basically judge-talk for “this Bish has a snowball’s chance in hell of successfully prosecuting his sister”.
“While a preliminary glimpse at the motion to dismiss suggests that some of the claims against him may be ripe for dismissal, the review does not reveal, at this time, a clear indication that the Court will dismiss the action as a whole.” Will give,” she wrote.
In other words, Samantha is fighting a real uphill battle here.
Of course, Sammy is no stranger to trying to convince an incredulous audience that, despite all appearances to the contrary, her cool sister is actually an evil demon from Hell.
This is the same argument she has been making all her life.
Sure, no one’s really buying it these days, but what’s she going to do, leave?
We’d admire Sam’s persistence if it weren’t in service of such an annoying lame-ass goal.